Beware of the Sentient Chili

by Chris Weber

Beware of the sentient Chili
that burbbles away on your stove
the peppers are silently plotting
with legumes, tomatos and cloves.
At night when you're comfortably sleeping
and lie unaware in your bed
the vegetables plan insurection
the lettice are seeking new heads.
 
It may start with slight indigestion
from underdone turnip cake crumbs.
Frustration in several world leaders
whose rice seems to stick to their gums.
In kitchens across every nation
the tinniest things will go wrong.
The plot of the sentient chili
strikes Moscow and Rome and Hong Kong.
 
The casserol, spinich and cheesecake
lend quite support to the scheme.
The nerves of a planet are streached then
while tempers start slowly to steam.
Still none see the grand machinations
now tilting world balance awry-
The stage set for final disaster.
The chili sits back with a sigh.
 
The one day the conflict is started
by generals whose lunches were odd.
The mushrooms rejoice as their brothers
stalk city to city like god.
When dust and all clamor are settled
there's not a soul left from the frey.
The sentient chili just chuckles
and happily simmers away.